Cannibal Holocaust 1980

Cannibal Holocaust 1980

 3 out of 5 stars.

Adult Stuff- Cheesy One Liners, Bad Language, Booze, Drugs, Pus, Blood, Bondage, Guts, Gore, Hoochie Girls, Boobs, Sex, Vagina, Penis, Penis Trauma

After 10- OK, simple idea, what happened to the other group.  Great, let's go!
After 40- Found the footage, kinda.
By The End- I was conflicted.

After Checking IMDB- Written by Gianfranco Clerici and Directed by Ruggero Deodato this film for the time caused quite a stir.  Looking back at it now it could be described as a Blairwitch style found footage flick with an underlying message about the state of competitiveness in TV ratings at the time.

To imagine it in the day, it could have been akin to the "torture porn" of the last decade.

I had never heard about this movie until I was reading up on "The Green Inferno", and why it took so long to come out.  I came across an article that referenced both movies, and felt I should watch it to better understand the article by Brett Arnold.

After reading the article and watching the movie I do not agree with Brett, but was grateful to learn about this movie.

If you like cannibal movies, and enjoy older films then this one should be on your list.  If you prefer your films with high production, and a modern feel, then you may want to pass on this one.

Until next time everybody, remember, Protect Your Privates!

Spoilers**

**I believe animals were harmed in the making of the film so if that bothers you then skip the film.
**The penis trauma is at 1:24:50 to 1:25:10

Arret Pipi (short)

Arret Pipi 2015 short

4 out of 5 stars.

This 5 minute short is written by Nils Vleugels and directed by Maarten Groen.  I did not get this short at first, but after reading the write up by Rob Munday I learned it was based on a Japanese urban legend.  This cleared up some of my confusion and increased the enjoyment of the short.

The stars of this short, Bo Maerten, Benjamin Moen, Pim Lambeau and Poal Cairo all did a great job bringing this short to life on the screen.  Bo Maerten really shines in this flick and her performance is more than noteworthy.

I hope I have a chance in the future to see something else from this writer or director.

Until next time everybody, remember, Protect Your Privates!

Last Shift 2014

Last Shift

4.5 out of 5 stars.

Adult Stuff- Cheesy One Liners, Bad Language, Booze, Drugs, Pus, Blood, Bondage, Guts, Gore, Hoochie Girls, Boobs, Sex, Vagina, Penis, Penis Trauma

After 10- Oh yeah, creepy AF!
After 30- WOW!  Great creepy vibe!  I am all tense and ready for shit to jump out of every shadow!
By The End- Ahhhh snap, tense and on the edge of my seat for most of the flick.

After Checking IMDB- Anthony DiBlasi directed this chilling, eerie ghost story and shares the writing credit with Scott Poiley; who also has a producer credit for this film.

This is the first film I have seen from this duo, and it had everything you need for a throat clenching edge of your seat ride along.

If you love a good ghost story this one has a little of everything for you. Things moving on their own, creepy stains, phone calls, flickering lights; a whole array of some of the best ghost maneuvers seen on the big screen.

I think I read somewhere that this movie had a small budget.  I was not able to confirm that, but since the cast list is only 14 people and everything seems to happen in one place it would make sense they wouldn't have a lot of budget, or they didn't need much.  If we run with the assumption that this is a low budget cabin in the woods style film, then it is very important to point out the acting of our protagonist Juliana Harkavy.

Juliana is a powerful actor.  Her filmography spans more than 2 decades, and the only way that a movie this size can be successful is with a lead that can carry every scene.  All the special effects, and wonderful ambiance of an actual abandoned police station are not enough if your actor can not sell them.

I did not recognize Juliana from the walking dead, and I am quite aghast at myself for that, but considering the quality of effects in the walking dead, and the skill set of Juliana, I hope she takes it as a compliment that in this movie I saw her only as the Rookie cop she was portraying.

If you are in the mood for chills and scares, a good story and good acting, put this one on your list.

Until next time everybody, remember, Protect Your Privates!

Spoilers**
-I saw the ending coming, possibly because I have seen too many of these movies, but possibly because it is something scary that really strikes at my core.
-If I had to say something bad it would be the volume range, from straining to hear the voice on the other end of the phone to the bangs down the hall that interrupt it, keep the remote close, and your finger on the volume.

The Pride of Strathmoor (2014 short)

The Pride of Strathmoor

I give this well made flick 3.5 out of 5 stars.

This 9 minute animated short is written, directed, and animated by Einar Baldvin, staring the voice of Geoffrey Gould.

This fictional portrayal of a few days in a south US town near the turn of the 20th century feels true to what we can imagine of the time. If any of these points appeal to you I am sure you will enjoy the short and the write up by Rob Munday.

Although the subject matter is not of interest to me personally, one should not let that take away from the quality of the short. The fun and freedom offered by being able to draw and animate your vision is one of the aspects of animation that I am jealous of.  If you like animation, boxing, or turn of the century stories, I hope you enjoy this one.

Until next time everybody, remember, Protect Your Privates.

House of 1000 Corpses

House of 1000 Corpses

3.5 out of 5 stars.

Adult Stuff- Cheesy One Liners, Bad Language, Booze, Drugs, Pus, Blood, Bondage, Guts, Gore, Hoochie Girls, Boobs, Sex, Vagina, Penis, Penis Trauma

After 10- and we wonder why clowns make us uncomfy.
After 40- everyone is sooo screwed!!!
By The End- Some mixed emotions to be honest.

After Checking IMDB- Written and Directed by Rob Zombie, and starring many great actors.

This movie is what I would call the angry child of  Natural Born Killers meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  1000 creatively bloody and insane scenes of a huge extended family of  murderous rebels. I found this movie to be a visual bombardment of crazy what if's that left me reeling with many unanswered questions.  The way the story seemed to jump from one incomplete thought to the next with film negative effects and channel surfing chatter; at least I didn't get a headache.

Rob Zombie with this movie easily proved that he knows scary.  This movie had all the right components for mastering the genre.but this was his first film,    For a first film this was a hell of a place to launch from; and we all know what happened next.

Until next time everybody, remember, Protect Your Privates!

Invaders (2014 short)

Invaders

I give this short 3.5 out of 5 stars.

This 7 minute short, written and directed by Jason Kupfer, has epic amounts of blood, and two unbelievably stupid antagonists. Regarding production and blood, this short has enough of both.  As for dialogue, story, and flow (pun intended) there is something missing from this short.

This short is not the first piece of work from Jason Kupfer, and it shows he has an understanding of how to mix funny and bloody.  If he puts out anything else down the road I would not shy away from watching it; I need to go watch his older works.

I was able to chuckle at this film, but without the "why do I care info", I could not get "interested" in the characters.

If you do watch this short, https://www.shortoftheweek.com/2015/11/24/invaders/ at least take the extra time to read the write up by Chelsea Lupkin, it is entertaining and includes some information from Jason Kupfer.

Until next time everybody, remember, Protect Your Privates.

**Spoilers**

* why them?
*why this house?
*why axes?
*why during a holiday dinner?
*who answers the door with an electric knife?
*and on and on and on.

Time Lapse

Time Lapse 2014

 4 out of 5 stars.

Adult Stuff- Cheesy One Liners, Bad Language, Booze, Drugs, Pus, Blood, Bondage, Guts, Gore, Hoochie Girls, Boobs, Sex, Vagina, Penis, Penis Trauma

After 10- Just enough mystery and creepy ambiance to get me interested.
After 40- Oh, when is it too much?  When does so good go soooo bad?
By The End- Ohhh, I love a fun, smart movie that makes ya think.  Reminds me a little of "Memento", but easier to keep track of.

After Checking IMDB- Directed by Bradly King who shares the writing credit with Bp Cooper.  Interesting points are the reference to a 1961 Twilight Zone and that the filmmakers entirely self financed the flick and wrote the script to fit their budget.

If you decide not to watch it please let it be because you are not in the mood for this type of flick or because temporal movies give you a headache, I know sometimes that's the case for me!

For his first full length film, and with only 4 other shorts under his belt, Bradly King knocks this one out of the park.  Bp Cooper is no stranger to film projects either, and all I can say is if this duo come up with something else down the road I will be eager to see it!

Until next time everybody, remember, Protect Your Privates!

Spoilers**

*Why would you keep doing bad things in front of your window? WTF?